“Trust is the easiest thing in the world to lose, and the hardest thing in the world to get back.”
—R. Williams
i remembered playing this game called trust fall 2 years back. the game is simple u step on a chair and stand on it, before fully falling backwards with your friends behind you supporting you. sounds easy since it’s only a short height, but there again questions come floating in your mind on what if i injured myself, what if my friends didn’t catch me…
i remembered that when i was really young, i had lots of fear. fear of the unknown literally – fear of the worse… well it could be due to my operation when i was 12 days old and this fear has crept into my soul since then. Well, many of fears then have been overcome by the grace and power of God – and i’ve learn to trust people more (not easily eh). But i guess the reason why i don’t tend to trust people that easily in the past was due to fear of the unknown, or rather everything that was unfamiliar. And to add on to that, based on unpleasant experiences back when i was in primary school, the feeling of suspicion and fear crept into my life. I didn’t want to trust my friends too much… for fear of betrayal and backstab. But over the years, i’m thankful for the friends that have been in my life – those who have opened themselves up and shared their lives with me. it’s an opening that allowed me to trust not only them but to let me know that it’s okay to give your trust in people. And when people fails at times, sometimes we just have to forgive and let go because they may have just been careless and have forgotten to keep their promises. Yet sometimes i take it too hard on myself that the friend have forgotten me or even betrayed me and my heart becomes hurt. I remembered during my jc years, i felt so pseudo in class coz i felt out of place. well i blame my friends initially but later i realise that it was my problem – a lack of trusting my friends and failing to feel easy and have fun. i guess it was my fear that consumed me back in the past that led me to lack trust in people.
i’m not saying that i don’t trust people. I guess i’ve overcome that stage of life and now i would trust people more (but of course with prudence and wisdom) and not become a doormat for people to step on. It’s definitely a risk writing this here coz there again, u’ll see people evaluating my life seeing if i’m trusting them or not… but well i guess everyone here is still learning how to trust. And primarily why i’m writing this is coz during sermon last week about trust, i realise how much i’ve overcome the lack of trusting others by His grace and i’m thankful for that. Trust can be so hard to attain yet so easily it can be broken…. Emotions may stir one up and affect one so badly… but can i say that God is the only one who’s faithful til the end so much so that we can trust in His character… And primarily when we put in our trust in Him, then we can trust others because we’ve experienced His trust.
Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
but we trust in the name of the LORD our God. ~ Psalms 20:7
Trust in the Lord and lean not on your own understanding, in all of your ways acknowledge Him and He’ll make your paths straight. ~ Prov 3:5-6

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